Sunday, December 21, 2008

what to do....

you know when you know what you should do but you don't want to do it because you'll have to do something that's really uncomfortable and possibly leading to a very tense home life?

Thursday, December 18, 2008

birfday

I am now 24 years old. That happened on Tuesday. Next year I will be a quarter century old. YAY?

I look at that number and it's weird to me for some reason. I can't quite place it. I have to figure out life again. Well, I know what to do with life. I'm pretty sure at least. I've just lost direction and I'm sort of on the course of getting it back. I'm just at a weird place in life right now I think. I have a bunch of stuff that I have to do and I don't want to do it. But if I don't do it, then I may as well curl up and die. But even that isn't really an option because if I do that then all my loved ones will be screwed and stuck with everything that I'd leave behind. BAH!

I'm gonna go do something semi constructive. If I stay here I think that I'll end up all mopey and I don't want that.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

100

this is post number 100 on this blog of mine. too bad I've got nothing good to put here, eh? Oh well. I've been uber busy trying to get my 50k words done for nanowrimo along with frustrations at work and helping my mom do some intensive cleaning here in the AZ. I'm at 16k right now. I need to get 20k more tomorrow if I want a chance at finishing up this thing. So, here's to hoping. I'm going to sleep now. Maybe I'll get up in the morning at write some more. I should.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

I'm crazy

So this month is National Novel Writing Month. I signed up for it and I'm writing. I have to write 2000 words a day in order to get to 50,000 words by the 30th. Why am I doing this to myself? I dunno. But I feel the need to for some reason. I have 2343 words as of this post. I'm thinking that I'm gonna start posting a blog daily so that I can let you all know how many words I've got so far.

In other news, I applied to volunteer at the BGCA in kingman yesterday. There's lots of stuff I could do there. The only thing we have to do is decide what. So....yeah. They said it takes about a week to process the application and do the background check and all that. So we'll see in a week what happens. YAY!

And now, I need to either sleep or write. So yeah. Laters.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

News

so, I'm cut to four day work weeks for the holidays.  I don't really mind so much though. The extra day off will help me stay healthy.  YAY!

Also, I have my test pilot episode up.  It's not even the true Pilot episode yet.  Watch it here and let me know what you think.  It'd be better if I had a tripod for the camera.   I should be able to get one with my next check though.  Here's to hoping.

Next, I haven't gotten much drawing done this past week because of two reasons.  I haven't been able to figure out what to put in the last couple panels of the latest comic that I'm drawing.  I just figured it out tonight so I'll draw it up as soon as I post this.  The second reason is I've started working on the computer end of things.  The next comic to be uploaded is almost ready for the words to be put on.  I had to learn a lot of new stuff, but it turned out pretty good I think.

I haven't checked out the Boys and Girls club yet, but I have tomorrow off so I figure I'll go in and see what happens.  I've got cousins coming in, but I should have time to get over there.

And lastly, some fun stuff.  I ran into this tonight.  Sooo great.  Please enjoy it at least half as much as I did.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die


YAY!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

UPDATES

Okay.  I've been working on figuring out stuff in GIMP for the past eight or so hours.  I've made a lot of progress but there's still a long way to go.  My right arm hurts from all the precision clicking. :D  And I'm keeping up on most of my drawing.  so YAY for that too.  And there's a new piece over at my DA too.  So head over there if you're interested.

I'm thinking that my best bet for the whole "helping out" thing is at the BGCA.  And if that's not a good place, I'm sure they'd know where I'd be best.  So I'll start there and see what happens.

So, to list them....
Comic/Drawing
Volunteer
Grandpa
Job

It's not a long list.  But they're all pretty involved.  Hopefully it won't make me too busy.  But I need to be busier than I already am.  It's a fine line that I have to find.  So let's hope and pray that I can. :D

I made an apple pie the other day.  I'm hoping to make some more this week.  Because the potluck is this sunday.  And I'll feel better about taking the food if I have something to offer.

Okay, I gotta sleep.  I'll talk at y'all later.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

"I can help these people!"

I think that's why I like Stargate so much.  That line.  And it's something that I say to myself quite often.  I don't know how, but I know I can help people.

I always seem to be slammed when this topic comes up.  I'd say it averages about once every three or four weeks.  I hear something that makes me start thinking about things that are wrong in the world, then I stumble on two or three different things that fit in that category.  And to illustrate what I mean, I'll give you tonight's story.

I turn on my iTunes and launch one of my podcast subscriptions.  It's a sermon given by Pastor Matt Brown from my home church, Sandals.  In this sermon, Matt is discussing what we as christians should be doing with the issue of abortion in the US.  As I'm listening, I start thinking about what I could offer in different positions/situations.  Helping the mother, taking care of the baby, encouraging life, and all that.  So yeah.  Then a few minutes after that, as I'm going through my blog roll, I notice some links in Lori Jo's latest entry.  So I go to the links.  BAM and BAM.  Two HUGE issues that I've always felt very strongly about.  I almost started crying.  How CAN I help?  I can't make any donations cuz my budget is tighter than spandex on a fat guy.  I signed up for the news letter at Project Nightlight, but it looks like most of what they do is in LA.  So if that's the case, then volunteering is out.  So I dunno.  I should definitely be looking for local things though.

So there it is.  Just thought I'd share.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

giraffetopus

I do need to draw that.  I keep forgetting.  I'd do it now but it's late and I need to sleep.  Keep reminding me Tom.

I have a new piece up at my devART.  Link on the side over there <---.  Man, I can't decide if I should file a formal complaint or not.  As christians we're supposed to forgive and all that, but at the same time, his behavior get worse and worse.  I had ultra violent thoughts about him at work on Saturday because of how he was acting.  So yeah.

I'm gonna start scanning in my pencils soon and getting them all ready for the site.  I'm not uploading them yet though.  I have to test some things out first.

Here's some fun for y'all.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

YAY!

So I did a picture of Benny.  I like Benny.  He's just crazy enough to like but not so crazy that you should be scared.  So yeah.  I finished up another comic tonight.  I think I'll start uploading as soon as I get this little arc done.  We'll see.  I haven't decided if I'm going to ink or not though.  I don't really want to ink, but I don't know how to scan in my pencils dark enough to not look weird with the dark word bubbles on them.  If anyone want's to give me some pointers on GIMP or can point me to some REALLY GOOD online tutorials, I'd be inclined to try and repay you with something.  I dunno what though.  I could draw you something I suppose.  I dunno.  Or maybe you just want to be nice :D

Anyhoo, they cut my hours at work because we're slow.  But after they cut my hours, they add onto my list of closing things to do.  That doesn't make much sense to me.  Oh well.  I got it done tonight so I shouldn't have too much trouble doing it again.  And I shouldn't have too much difficulty cleaning the ceiling tomorrow.  We'll see about that too.

I've been feeling bitter about things at work lately.  I know I shouldn't be getting as upset as I have been lately.  It's starting to bother me.  So maybe some prayer for that would help.  and that's another thing.  I haven't been reading and praying nearly as much as I should be.  So yeah..........

I know how to interact with grandpa now though.  That's an upside in life right now.  If I assist him in little tinkering things, he opens up a bit more and we actually get close to conversation.  So if that could happen a bit more, that would be neat-o.

And that's life right now.  I'm gonna go read some.  Laters!

Monday, October 13, 2008

quickie

okay, I don't feel well but I had to put this up.  I'm rather proud of it.  It's long and don't let the kiddies watch it.  A few words slipped.


Sunday, October 12, 2008

They're members of the human race

I ran into this and I just had to share it. It's made sort of as a joke, but I like what it has to say. It's a good reminder that we're all people. We're more that what we do for a living. So just keep that in mind next time you're order is wrong or it takes a while to get something done. We're all people and we all should be treated as such. :D

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

ART!

So I have something new in my sidebar.  I was drawing and as I was drawing, I remembered that I opened up a DeviantArt account forever ago.  So I uploaded some of the new stuff there and now there's a link to it.  I'll change the image over there occasionally but maybe not as often as I upload new stuff.  And as I said over on DA, I plan on putting something new up there at least once a week.  So check that out every now and then.  There will be new stuff up over there before I get to uploading any more comics.

So I was planning on blogging yesterday, but I got distracted.  I ran into that last week while reading about the adventures of Greg.  And then I was gonna blog tonight but then I got distracted by all the deviants.  But when I finished uploading, I figured I should share with you guys since you're helping me keep up on it.  So here you go.  Comments are always appreciated on art. :D

Thursday, October 2, 2008

It's bed time

I need to get in bed but I also need to put something here before I do.

I penciled my third page since I started again.  The other two I split over a couple days to keep myself from burning out, but this one just sort of fell together.  I like it when that happens.

Work was weird today.  It seemed like everyone else was stressing and busy busy busy and I was just on cruise control.  I dunno.  It was weird to me.  I scraped my knuckle on the griddle.  It hurt.  A lot.  And now I have a blister.  But other than that my day was pretty alright.

I have to say thanks to Anita for kicking me in the butt to draw today.  I'm glad she did.

And now I'm off to bed.  Gotta be at work in 10 hours and I like to sleep for about 8.  Toodles!

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Jesus Is My Friend

I just had to copy Justin on this one. This song(and video) is too great not to share. As I'm typing this I'm listening to it for the third time. Sooooooo great.

So yeah. I just had to spread that the little bit that I can. Wow. I love that song. I need to figure out how to rip it off the video so I can put it
on my iTunes. Or something. I dunno. It's time for bed. I'll talk at y'all laters.

Monday, September 29, 2008

BLOG!

so I'm writing this because I feel that I have to.  how weird is that?  Not that I don't like doing this.  I guess part of it is that I actually feel like I slowly making my way into the blogging community.  It's strange to me.

so anyhoo, first things first, there was a comment from someone and I don't know who and they want me to post a link.  I don't know what they want me to post a link to.  So, whoever you are, comment me again and tell me what link you want.  I'll do it if  I can.

I'm slowly building a stack of drawings.  I got sick so there where a couple days I didn't do any drawing, but I am drawing mostly every day.  I finished up another comic tonight.  I wish I had some editing software.  I could get some I suppose.  But I'm just gonna focus on getting drawing done for now.  Once I have that turned into a habit I'll look into getting something to actually finish the comics for posting.  I did figure something out this week that's been bugging me for months though.  I think you guy's will like her.  I know I like her.  She's the quiet type that just needs some friends.  YAY!

Now, I need insurance for my truck.  And I keep forgetting to call and get estimates.  HEY!  I just remembered all those websites.  Wow.  I can't believe it didn't occur to me sooner.  Of course, in my defense, I've been sick.  Alrighty, I'll go check those out here soon.

So, Life is good some what out here in the AZ.  I miss Cali and people laugh at me for it, but what ever.  I'll be back soon enough.  

And now I'm tired and must sleep.  And must shop for insurance.  BOO.  g'night ever'body!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

woot!

so as I was drawing tonight, I finally figured out what she looks like.  Of course, I've forgotten her name, but that'll come to me again when I need it.  I don't think I'll post pics here though.  I don't like doing spoilers like that.  You'll just have to wait until she comes into the story.  Should be soonish though so don't worry too much.

now,I have a lot of interests with online things.  I started reading webcomics long before I even knew what a blog was.  The idea of having my own comic on the web intrigued me more than anything else I'd ever experienced.  This was forming in my head around the time I started my first blog back in the day on AOL dial up.  A few months of blogging and my idea formed in my head.  It was inspired by a plethora of webcomics and is sort of an amalgam of all of them that I was reading at the time.

I started drawing as soon as I figured out how I wanted all the characters introduced.  I always think it's fun that the initial idea sprang forth from a drawing of Tina.  Although she wasn't Tina then.  She was just the Laughing Girl.  So I started drawing but had no way to get the paper into digital format for posting online.  Oh well.  I just kept drawing.  And now we're here.  I've gone through a lot of ups and downs.  Long periods of not posting.  And thats no way to build readership.  So this next year that is my resolution.  Two comics a week.  If y'all read this blog, then I'm hoping you also read my comic and yell at me when I don't update in a timely fashion.

I'm hoping to start updating again before the year is out mainly so that I can develop a solid schedule to follow through next year.  Plus I want to see all the characters become who they're meant to be.  For those of you who've never experienced it, it's one of the most amazing things.  When you start a story, the characters do everything that you want them to do.  But as the story progresses, they turn into their own beings.  You no longer dictate what they do, but who they are dictates what happens when they're involved in certain scenarios.  Anyhoo, I've blathered enough about that.  I'll definitely be posting an announcement when the next comic page is up.

And now I'm off.  have fun every body.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

wowwee

So I was about to go to bed but then I noticed that my download is nearly complete so  I decided to to stay up a bit and let it finish.  "how shall I pass that time?" The answer: BLOG!

It's been a while since I'd posted anything and I had nothing to work with coming in.  but then I noticed my two new comments.  YAY! someone loves me!

One of them said I should be the world's fattest man.  Not a goal of mine but still funny so yeah...
The other one told me to find what I do best and be famous for that.  Now that's something I can do.  I'm good at lots of things, but what do I do best?  I don't know.  It's hard to pay attention to myself when I'm actually doing stuff, and when I'm done and have time to contemplate, I usually don't know what I've done best that day.  So this might take some help from other peeps.  But I'm all down for finding this out.

On another note, I have drawing supplies now.  That means I can draw.  And that also means I can work on the comic.  And I sort of started that up again tonight.  I didn't start drawing pages for the actual comic but I worked on getting my "drawing hand" back.  I don't know when I'll be updating.  I can scan the images but I have no editing software yet and I don't know if I'll be able to get any.  I could always download GIMP again I guess.  Anyhoo, that's comic stuff.  OH!  And I'm trying to develop a drawing habit.  I need to draw every day if I'm ever going to get around to the end of the story in the comic.  So this is a call out to everyone that knows me.  Keep on my butt please.  Contact me any way you know how and ask if I'm drawing, yell at me for not drawing, etc.  This will help me out a lot.  It really will.

And now some link love.  Whittaker Woman was kind enough to send me that bit'o'help advice and kindly requested a bit'o'love.  So she is now LINKED there on the left.  Go check her out.  Cute kids abound. ;)

Friday, September 5, 2008

man oh man

I've had thoughts the last couple days about starting something and becoming famous for it.  I'm not entirely sure why but it's been happening.  Just a minor thing on my mind though.  I don't have any good ideas anyway.  Besides, most people make it big just by doing what they do.  What do I do?  I read, cook, watch you tube.  The middle one gives me options of either having a famous restaurant or having a show on Food Network.  I might have a popular comic if I ever get back to it, but that is unlikely from where I'm standing.

And now I switch to depressing thoughts of me being wishy-washy and never finishing anything.  but I'll try not to let that happen too much.  I can't change the past and the future is undetermined but the present is where I can focus and get stuff done.  So I'll just take things as they come and hopefully all the long term commitments I make I'll be able to follow through on.

Friday, August 22, 2008

work

I started my new job on tuesday.  I am now a buffet cook at the Flying J.  I'm cooking!  WOOT!  It's aggravating sometimes, but what job isn't?  The people are cool and I know that I'm there for  a reason.  So, I'm working eight hours straight and then some.  I should be able to get it down to JUST eight hours though here in the next week.  Once I get my pattern down for breaking down the buffet.

Grandpa's doing okay.  He's got hernia surgery coming up here in a few weeks.  They don't have a specific date set yet though.  And my mom and step dad came out to visit this weekend so that's pretty cool.  My mom is gonna help me organize some cupboards.  YAY!

I'm still reading alot.  I'll be finishing up Don't Waste Your Life this week and I'm about 2/3 through the Psalms.  Next up on my list is The Great Divorce.  And speaking of, I need to update my book list over there on the left.  So I'm gonna go do that now and then do some reading.  YAY!  I'll talk at y'all later.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Kingman 03

So I've signed myself up with a temp agency. That means that I should be getting SOMETHING in the next week or so. We'll see if that actually happens. Grandpa's fine, I'm fine, the dog's fine. And fine is really the only way to describe us. None of us are outstanding but none of us are really crappy either. We're just........okay.

I started thinking today about why I came out here. I was in the back room falling into a funk and I started thinking to myself, "Do I really have a good, legitimate reason to be out here?" I started going over everything that I had told myself and everything that I had told others.
I'm helping my grandpa out.
I'm getting away from distractions to really get close to God.
I can get a job easier.
The change of pace will help me get a better grip on life.
I'll find a mentor in my grandpa.
And others that I know I had that I don't remember right now.
Are any of these true? Am I doing any of these things out here? Right now, no. Of course this is only the first month, right? It'll get better right? These things will start happening, right? I don't know. And no one else on earth knows either. God only knows what's gonna happen in my life.

But there is one thing that I know for sure. One good reason for me to be out here. It's good that I'm away from that person. If I wasn't, I don't know how well I'd be doing right now. I'd probably be doing a LOT worse. So it's good even though it sucks. Kind of like doing situps. Or running the mile. Or something like that. So I at least have this sort of mental trainging happening. WOOT.

I'm having to re-learn a lot of stuff out here. Stuff like, trusting God and His provision. Trusting His plan. So we'll see how that goes too. I've gotta go read so I'll see y'all later.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Kingman II

So a lot has happened and nothing has happened since last week.

I've driven all around this town and only one place is willing to give me an interview. I'm going in tomorrow to schedule it. Perhaps I'll get interviewed tomorrow. That would be cool.

I've a friend I've been talking to a lot this past week. It's been nice and it's really helping me to stretch and grow. I'm hoping the trend continues. I have a long way to go and not much time to get there.

I'm reading a lot. My bible and a lot of christian books. They're all opening my eyes to things. So I'll be sticking with that while I'm out here.

My grandpa's doing pretty good. I'm thinking that he's really glad that I'm out here. He's got someone to talk to when he wants to talk. He doesn't talk often, but when he does he really needs to. So I'm the listening ear mostly. Which I'm okay with. I'm good at listening.

That's it folks. Like I said, a lot has happened but nothing has happened. So I'll see ya'll next week.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Kingman

So I'm here in Kingman, AZ now. My phone isn't working. And now I can't even find it. Oh well. I'm planning on updating once a week here so that people can know what's going on. So I was driving all tuesday night and got here about 7am. I started applying for jobs nearby and I'm hoping that I can land something this week. If you can just pray for provision. I started reading my big stack of books too. I might get through them by january. I'm hoping for that anyway. So that's it for now. I'll see y'all next week.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Messed up sleep schedules and such

I woke up at about ten thirty pm. I've been awake about seven hours now. I'm not sure if I should try and snooze for a few more hours or just stay awake until tonight. Oh well. I had fun making that food though. And it came out really good despite the fact that I had no idea what I was doing. I just thought of something and tried it out and it worked. YAY! I don't know why I keep doubting myself. Well, I do know why I keep doubting myself. It's because I have very little experience when it comes to coming up with a meal and making it. But so far, each time I've done it, it's been a complete success. I need to do it more often I think.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Twice

So, twice this week I've had to do things out of my control that totally messed me up for getting anything done as far as job search. It's annoying.

The comic is moving along nicely though. Maybe if I get to be Internet Famous I won't need a "job". I dunno. I'm kind of hopeful for that but who knows. Anyhoo....

Other thoughts:

I need to keep the Gaming Ministry in prayer. I still feel like it should be done, but it's not time yet.

It's sooo tempting to give into thoughts about certain people of the female persuasion. But I can't. It's a promise that I made to myself, God, and my small group. So, yeah.

that's it for now. I'll talk at you all later.

Monday, May 5, 2008

Comic and other things

So I've got the second update of the week up now.  WOOT!  Check it out if you haven't done so yet.  I also suggest reading through the archives as well if you haven't yet.

I miss my Finnish friends.  They were cool.

I guess I had less than I thought.  Oh well.  Perhaps I'm just really distracted right now.  That could be it.

Good bye for now all.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

options

So, I have a lot to think about as far as jobs and comics and ministry. I figured I'd just write down everything I have up here in my head and come back to it later.

Jobs:
I figured that I'll just apply for that dish washer position and see where it goes. I'll also put out a bunch of other applications but I'm thinking that I'll just take the job that's guaranteed right now.

Comics:
Here's the plan as far as comics go. I'll draw one comic each weekday as well as a sketch on saturdays and sundays. That way I'm doing it all the time. This should keep me busy with stuff and I"ll keep up on things.


Ministry:
We need a bunch of tech people for Pipeline and Frontside. I'm not really sure how to recruit the people that we need though. But we need them. Ideally we'd have enough people to have two different people for each service each week. That would mean that we need six people each week. We have two. So we need four more. and that's just Pipeline. I don't know what frontside needs. Anyhoo.....


So that's what's there. I'll think about it al llater.

Friday, May 2, 2008

GAH! Frustrated!

So, I found out tonight that I really NEED a mac.  This program will do exactly what I want a program to do without being super complicated but I can't use it because it's for macs and I don't have a mac.  I've wanted a mac ever since I got the idea to do a comic because I knew that macs were better suited for things of a creative nature.  But I was always able to tell myself that I didn't need one.  Now I find out about this program and get all excited but I can't use it.  SUCK.  Oh well.  I still have something that works for me and I know how to use it.  It just sucks when you get your hopes up and then they're dashed away, you know.

But I've started scripting again and I have a plan for drawing and posting comics.  I know that I say this and then nothing happens, but this time it will.  I'm gonna have people keeping me accountable.  People keeping you accountable are a good thing.  So the first new comic should be up on the site on monday.

OH!  And there's a new blog in town.  Sheer Audacity by my good pal Nate.  Check it.

And that's it for now.  See y'all later.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

mmmm....Fruits of Labour

So, I made some cheesecake and just tasted some of my wares.   Soooo delicious.  It would be better with a fruit topping though.  Or perhaps some chocolate sauce.  Mmmmm.

I really need to stay awake today.  I stayed up monday night in an attempt to fix my messed sleep schedule, but then I ended up falling asleep at noon thirty.  I woke up at 6pm.  So I've been awake for a little over 14 hours now.  I can make it if I find stuff to do though.  Stuff that will keep my mind occupied.  As long as I can keep my mind busy with something simple, yet engaging, I'll be able to stay awake with minimal issue.  Plus I'll be making myself take caffeine boosts at timed intervals through out the day, with the last one being at about 5pm so that it can work it's way through and be cleared out of my body by about 9 or 10.  At that time I'll crash and hopefully wake up 6 to 8 hours later feeling refreshed and ready for thursday.  That's the plan anyway.  Here's to hopin' it works.

So someone has recently (officially) joined in on this whole blogging thing.  She now has her own DOTblogspotDOTcom address now.  YAY!  So lets show her some love and bombard her with comments and such.  Tread Softly...You Tread On My Dreams is open for business.  WOOT WOOT!

Sunday, April 27, 2008

short and sweet

So I'm at pipeline right now and I don't have oodles of time, but I figured I'd throw something up. We got our new mac book today. It's pretty sweet. There's a few things that we'll have to work out, but it should work out super nicely. We found a few background videos that we've never seen too. And apparently we've had them on our old computer for.......a really long time. It's rather interesting.
And now I must go work. ta for now.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Save The Internet

I hate politics and anyone who knows me knows this. But this is an issue that I've seen before and I know that it's an issue that will remain at large for some time. That issue is Net Neutrality. Basically, we need to keep the net as it is now. That's all that Save The Internet.com is trying to do. And I've decided to jump on the band wagon. I won't be all "OMG! my internets are being taken away!"*emo tear* But I'll be making occasional updates on information and whatnot.

if Net Neutrality goes away:
Blogs will virtually cease to exist. YouTube and MySpace will disappear. For some, this might sound like a good thing, but it's not. Google might live through it. Any site that allows Joe Schmoe to put up a web page will fall to ruin because no one will be able to access their sites; why use it anymore? This issue affects every single citizen of the United States.

Here's what Google has to say.
And for those of you opposed to reading through all these links, here are a couple videos that sum it all up fairly simply. There's a few things that are in here that are emotional and intend to rile up emotions, but focus on what is being said and not the emotional vomits.

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Sunday, April 20, 2008

The first week back

As some of you know, I just gat back from Finland a week ago.  And now that I'm back, I'm feeling rather weird about being back.  It's like I'm a map that's been opened up of a few hours.  Even if you fold on the lines exactly the same way it was folded in the first place, it still doesn't feel or look the same as it did.  I'm too different to allow myself to fall into the same patterns I had before I left.  But how do I change things up?  This is my current conundrum.  So I need to stop distracting myself and sit and hash this one out, yeah?

Things I know:
-I need to really step things up at Pipeline
-I have goals set that I haven't even started to work towards
-I really need to pray more about a lot of different things
-I get distracted from things more easily than I'd like

A little girl in Finland gave me a "lucky moon".  I'm keeping it in my pocket notebook right now.  I don't know why I feel like I should keep it.  It's just a little paper moon that she cut out.  Interestingly enough, there have been many a night where the moonlight was very comforting and calming for me.  How could she know that?  She's only 10 or so.  Odd how my brain pulls these things together.  MAny a time I've made connections between things that may or may not have been mere coincidence.  Of course that brings up the classic question, "Is there such a thing as a coincidence?"  My answer: yes there are mere coincidences, but not as many as people think.  And there are more connections than people realize as well.

Take our team.  We were all there to do something.  We all had specific reasons we were there.  I don't know mine, because I never see what I contribute to anything.  Perhaps God blocks this from me so that I don't get a big head.  But a few of us were there specifically to talk to specific people.  A few of us were there to encourage our brothers and sisters across the globe.

And this is where my brain gets jumbled to the point that I'm too tired to really keep typing.  Plus I gotta get up in five hours so I can be at Pipeline.  So away I go folks.  I'll finish up later.  If I remember.

Monday, February 25, 2008

so.....it's been a while

when you leave something for a long time and then try and get back into it, it's really weird. You fee like you should be able to just jump right back in, but the abilities you had developed are no longer developed. Thus, you have to start over like you had never done it in the first place. I came to this realization today. I jumped into three things that I used to do a lot, but haven't done in a long, LONG time.

One of those things was exercise. I'm still a bit sore from what I did this afternoon. The only reason that I was able to move after doing all those sit ups and push ups was my job. Being a bus boy is very physical, so my new exercise routine didn't kill me from the start.


The next thing was my comic. I started drawing again. It took quite a bit of work to get the main character down. I had lost him and had to do a few takes before I had a semblance of him back in my mind and hand. So now I will draw everyday. This will do a number of things. One, my comic will start to be updated again. Two. I will start doing something productive that will give me a feeling that I've accomplished something each day so I don't feel like a total loser. Three, I'll be acting on one of my dreams.

And the third thing I jumped back into was this. Blogging. It's not as hard as the other things, but I had to get my brain to a point where it was able to just start expelling thoughts. I haven't done that in a while so that took some mental gymnastics for me. But by this point, I'm fully back in the game. So I blog on. I should try to blog daily. Will I ? I don't know. Maybe not. It's really not as important in my life as the other two things.

And now that I'm done with those thoughts, I look at the clock and tell myself, "Oh crap." I have to be awake in six hours so I'm gonna leave now. bye bye all. pray for me if you get an inkling.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

life as we know it

I'm growing a mustache
I figured out what my core sin is
I kind of have a plan in place to beat it


I don't really like my mustache, but they allow them at disneyland and I really want something on my face. I currently have no one to try and impress so I'm in the clear on that front. It's just me and my facial hair. YAY!

And that's all I have time for. If you read this, pray for me. I need it.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

nutshells

Well, a lot is happening in my life right now. One, I'll be going to Finland in April with a group from my church. I'm really looking forward to the trip, but at the same time there's the underlying worry that Disney won't approve the time off and I'll lose my job if I go. But then again, I would kind of enjoy losing my job because that would give me a reason to get a job somewhere else. I keep going in circles like that in my head. So that's that situation.

Another thing is my vow of singlehood for the year. It'll be good and for the most part it's really a non-issue at the moment. But I still find myself thinking about a lot of different things surrounding the issue, namely girls that are big parts of my life. And that's how vague it is in my head. I'm glad for this though. The vagueness helps me not dwell on the thoughts too much. And I realized on my way home tonight that I need to take an approach on this subject in a way that most people would think is cold and unfeeling. I need to weigh out all the pros, cons, options, etc. in a near clinical manner. Putting it in words like this makes it sound like I have no feelings or something, but I do and that's why I must do it this way.

And finally, I'm trying to start getting my life together. I'm trying to organize, de-junkify, and increase productivity. AKA grow up. It's really hard. And I'm not even sure of how to do any of it. But I figure that I'll figure it out if I stick to it.

And that's how I'm doing right now

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Goals and Incentives

So we had a sermon on goal setting this past week. I was thinking about it all today and decided that I should make a list of daily goals and incentives to go with them. I got my goals down and how to reach them, but I couldn't think of any incentives to go with those goals. So I started asking around about incentives. The following is the list I was able to put together from what people shared with me.

If you achieve your goal for the day, you can:
Watch a TV show that you really like to watch.
Treat yourself to a small sweet or some other food.
Tell others about it and receive their praise.

Something else to try could be to make it into a step process. And you don't let yourself go to the next step until you've completed the first one. Or perhaps you could create tangible evidence of your progress in your goal. Those are just thoughts of mine that I'm throwing out there. And now I need to get myself to bed. I stayed up later than I intended.